The Golden Book: The History of the Tessler Family Circle

(This first section was written by Eddie Kaplan in 1968 for the 25th anniversary of the Tessler Family Circle.  It describes the Circle’s history from its inception through its silver anniversary).

There were additional Golden Book Updates written for the 45th, 50th, and 80th anniversaries of the Tessler Family Circle.

It was 1943, and the world was torn apart by war. The Tessler Family Circle was no exception.  Some of its members were already in military service, and others were waiting to be called. There was a need to keep the family together, and so the Tessler Family Circle came into being.

Actually, the history of the Circle begins many years prior to 1943, with the two people for whom it was named - Tauba and Abraham Tessler. They were married in Zhitomir, Russia, and became the parents of eight daughters followed by a son. The family was a closely-knit one, but because of conditions in Russia, Abraham left his home to seek a better way of life in America. He was accompanied by two of his children, Anna and Lilly, when he arrived in this country in 1913.

For eight years, Abraham and his daughters worked to bring the rest of the family here. During this time - the time of World War I - the family in Russia suffered endless hardships. Tauba, particularly with the help of her daughter Mucie, managed to keep the family together, despite many difficulties.

Finally, in 1921, the family was reunited in New York. One can readily imagine the joy of the occasion. Except for one daughter, Fannia, who remained in Russia with her own family, the Tesslers were all together again. Unfortunately, Abraham did not live long enough to enjoy many of the fruits of his labor, for he died just a few years later in 1925.

At the time the Tessler Family Circle was settled in America, Anna was already married to Leon Kaplan, and Lilly to Paul Goldsman. These two sons-in-law, the first in the family, had struggled along with Abraham, Anna and Lilly to bring their relatives here. Leon and Paul set an example of devotion the later members of the family were to follow. It was this feeling that inspired the founding of the Circle.

Gradually, other children of the Tessler Family married and raised families of their own. The years of the depression were extremely difficult ones, but the loyalty of the Tessler Family was something that no amount of money could buy. Very few members of the family were in a position to help financially in time of need, but they would pitch in unselfishly to help in any way they could. During illness, it was not unusual for children to be boarded out with aunts and uncles for weeks on end, and one's own comfort was the last thing to be considered.

But just as their children were growing up, just as the future looked hopeful, our country plunged into war.

The First Meeting

The first meeting of the Tessler Family Circle was held on November 20, 1943 at the home of Lilly and Paul Goldsman. It would be hard to describe the happiness that Tauba Tessler felt as the Circle was created. She was to see the Circle only in its infancy, however, for she died just two years later, on November 1, 1945.

Understandably, many problems faced the young organization, and at the first meeting, certain basic principles were established. Members approved "Tessler Family Circle" as the official name, and decided to draft a constitution. Officers were elected and membership dues determined. Perhaps the most significant outcome was unanimous enthusiasm on the part of all its members.

Because many of the decisions reached at this time served as a foundation on which the Tessler Family Circle grew, we are recording the actual minutes of this important first meeting, as written by Paul Goldsman. (Does anyone know where these minutes are?)

The Constitution

Regardless of its purpose, every organization must abide by certain rules and procedures. Thus, approval of a constitution was one of the first accomplishments of the Tessler Family Circle. Accordingly, officers were to be elected for a term of two years. They included a president, vice president, four trustees, a secretary, and a treasurer. At the first meeting of the Circle, the following were elected to office:  Leon Kaplan, president; Joseph Refkin, treasurer; Paul Goldsman, secretary; and Lilly Goldsman, Celia Kaplan, Ben Weingarten, and Jack Kartzinel, member of the board of trustees.

Definition of membership was another important aspect of the Circle's constitution. Only immediate members of the Tessler Family, as well as their spouses, were entitled to membership. Children of members could join the Circle when they married.

The Scope of the Circle

The chief reason for organizing the Tessler Family Circle was clear from its very inception - to form a close bond among individuals of the Tessler family. During the war, for example, the Circle sent packages to relatives in service. Through the years, members presented new ways to enrich the Circle's activities. The Circle became active in fund raising and contributed money to organizations such as the Red Cross, U.S.O., Home of Incurables, Joint Distribution, United Jewish Appeal, March of Dimes, Federation of Jewish Philanthropies, and various Zionist groups. Helping worthy causes remains one of the Circle's principal interests.

The Circle Grows

As the founders' children grew, so did the Circle. When they married, they and their spouses automatically became members. Mildred and Harold Rothstein, Norma and Arthur Friedman, Sylvia and Murray Scheiner, Martin and Phyllis Refkin, George and Gloria Goldsman, Leonard and Beth Wasserman, Irwin and Barbara Kartzinel, Marlene and David Storm, Rita and Mel Eisenstein, Joe and Carol Costin. Thus, most of the second generation became an intimate part of the Tessler Family Circle.

The Circle really came of age when it required larger quarters. Meetings had been held in member's homes each month, but as membership increased, a regular meeting place was selected  Each meeting continued to be hosted by a different member. Many are the happy evenings shared by members and their guests when joyous occasions were celebrated.

Even children of the third generation have come to feel the spirit of the Tessler Family Circle, from their participation in meetings. For the past few years, the last meeting of the season has been turned over to the youngsters. They become honorary officers of the Circle for the evening, and conduct the business of the Circle. In addition, a Chanukah party is held each year in their honor, so that they and their relatives can celebrate the holiday together.

Greater Communication

A month between meetings can be a long time when one member lives here, and another, there. And, very often, more than a month may go by before members see each other. A welcome solution to the communication gap came about ten years ago, in the form of a newsletter sent to members shortly before each meeting. Its purpose was to keep members up to date on Circle news, meetings, and special events. As editor of the Circle's newsletter, Paul Goldsman devoted his time and energy for many years. He was ably assisted by Murray Scheiner and Arthur Friedman, who, to this day, show their devotion to the Circle and the memory of Paul by never missing a deadline.

A Dream Come True

From the time the Circle was founded, one member was missing. Through the years, her absence was felt deeply, for it kept the family from being complete. Fannia, the eldest daughter of Tauba and Abraham Tessler, had remained in Russia, separated from her relatives, for about thirty-eight years. But, in 1959, an almost impossible dream came true. Fannia arrived in this country with her daughter Lucy, her son-in-law Janek, and her granddaughters Valerie and Gail. Fannia, Lucy and Janek became members of the Circle the very moment they stepped off the plane. Who can ever forget the pride in Fannia's face whenever she attended a meeting. But, the dream ended too soon. We lost Fannia just three years after she reentered the lives of the family.

When they married, Fannia's granddaughters and their husbands became the first Circle members of the third generation, and Gail and Jeff Kaplan's son Eric was the first member of the fourth generation.

This brief history of the Tessler Family Circle was written at the time the Circle celebrated its twenty-fifth anniversary, in November 1968. Understandably, it is difficult to condense such a span of time into a few pages. We hope that these first twenty-five years are just the beginning of a long and happy life for the Circle and all of its members.


(This next section was written for the 45th anniversary celebration in 1988.)

In the years that followed, the Circle grew stronger. Many new ideas were proposed and instituted. As a result, we now celebrate Passover with a Family Circle Seder and have our annual Chanukah party. The Circle's sick benefit fund has increased considerably to care for members during illnesses. Fortunately, it has not been used too frequently. And, Women's Lib came to the Circle when Rita Eisenstein was elected its first woman president. Supporting worthy causes is still one of the Circle's chief interests.

Once again, we are here celebrating an important event in the Tessler Family Circle - the 45th Anniversary of its founding. Forty-five years of togetherness is truly something to be celebrated even in a marriage where only two people are primarily involved. When one considers how many different individuals constitute the Circle, it is easy to see that a 45th Anniversary is a landmark occasion.

Now that the Circle has reached this point in its history, perhaps we should pause to examine its true meaning. The original purpose of the Circle was to form a close bond among members of the Tessler Family, but today its significance is much greater. The Circle is an important part of our heritage. Already it encompasses three generations with a fourth on the way. The Circle cannot be all things to all members, but it is a vital link to our roots.  It gives us a sense of identity and belonging that we should all treasure.

In the past five years, we have welcomed new members who married:  Ted and Meryl Friedman, Jay and Carol Scheiner, Eddie and Bonnie Tessler, and Shereen and Jeff Bloom.                     Unfortunately, we have suffered the loss of Minnie Costin, Anna Kaplan, and Eddie Kaplan, who wrote this history of the circle.

On the occasion of this 45th Anniversary, we congratulate the Tessler Family Circle and its members, and wish them health and happiness in the coming years with a grand celebration of our 50th Anniversary next to come.


(This chapter was written in 1993 for the 50th anniversary of the Tessler Family Circle.)

And now, we have reached the 50th, our Golden Anniversary, and the year is 1993. The achievement becomes more significant as we find about us many worthy organizations losing strength and often falling by the wayside. Changes in lifestyle, a growing apathy to organizational activities, the advent of television with all its attractions - all have been blamed for this.

We have not come out unscathed, but we have survived and we optimistically look forward to many more anniversaries. Our monthly meetings have been reduced in number to just four each year. Our Chanukah party and annual Passover Seder continue to be significant events in our lives, and create the "togetherness" that our Circle aims to provide.

Murray Scheiner has produced and prepared for delivery to us, on this occasion, a beautifully designed Family Tree that shows how our small nucleus in 1943 has grown to 139 people - past, present and future qualifiers for membership in our Tessler Family Circle.

Although the Tree continues to grow and will continue to bear witness to the existence of all our family members, nature has ordained that some leaves must fall from the tree. And so, in the last five years, we have lost some of our beloved members:  we note the passing of Tante Mucie, Gloria Goldsman, Laura Tessler and Malvina Gaidukowski, whom we memorialize here.

At the same time, in the last five years, wedding bells have brought us new members:  Eric and Julia Kaplan, Lori and Noel Boyland, Lois and Louis Alvarez, Marc and Joyce Kartzinel.

Future members, too, have been added through our nursery section. Of special note is that after many years, we have added Daniel and Nathan Tessler, new bearers of the family name.  May this be symbolic of a new energy to be created in the Tessler Family Circle to help it flourish and to celebrate for many years to come.


(This chapter was written by Lois Refkin in 2023 for the 80th anniversary of the Tessler Family Circle.)

With the Circle now in its 80th year, the world is both very similar to how it was when the Circle began and also extraordinarily different. Our world remains a complicated place with wars destroying lives, including in our ancestral city of Zhitomir, which was one of the first to be reported as suffering from Russian bombing. Yet we have had the good fortune as a family to grow in relative safety and security, thanks to our ancestors taking the extraordinary measure of leaving behind all they knew.

While very few of the original members of the Circle remain -- Martin Refkin, Leonard Wasserman, Marvin Wasserman, and Rita Eisenstein -- the resilience of the Circle continues. We now live across the country, from California to New York to Florida, from Louisiana to North Carolina to Massachusetts. Our oldest member, Martin, is 96, and we are now in our seventh generation. There are 238 leaves on our beautiful family tree. The presidency of the Circle has moved to new generations, with Alan Rothstein as our president, David Refkin as treasurer, Bonnie Tessler managing our website and communications, Paul Goldsman coordinating with his generation, and Lindsay Bloom sharing our family birthdays and anniversaries and carrying on her grandmother Marlene’s greetings in the 21st century.

And as we have grown, technology -- in the form of the Internet and DNA testing -- has also enabled us to look to the past, unlocking our genealogy to discover relatives afar and the history that we spring from. We were found by a distant cousin in Montreal, Philip Minkin, who has done extraordinary genealogical work about our family, discovering that there was actually a 10th Tessler child, a boy named Joseph, who died as a baby; the official birth, marriage, and death dates of many of our ancestors; and the addresses in Zhitomir where our family lived. Actually, it seems that they moved there from Berdichev, the city of famous writer Sholem Aleichem, and they moved to Berdichev from Gaiki, an agricultural village, and the origin of our matriarch Taube Tessler’s family name, Gaietsky. Very recently, Philip learned the history backing up the story that many of us heard growing up, of one of our ancestors being a victim of a Zhitomir pogrom by nationalists. With his discovery of a record in the Ukrainian archives, we now know that the man whose tragic death resonated through the stories we heard was the father of Avram Tessler, Moishe-Mendel, and that it occurred in 1919, just before the second group of the family departed for the United States.

To renew our connections to each other we have returned to an old tradition: as the Circle did at its inception, we gather in a family home, now on a yearly basis. Younger members maintain their own group, meeting and connecting through social media. We have also continued our founders’ philanthropic efforts, raising money for efforts including helping each other through COVID-pandemic economic strife. And we have welcomed many new members, even as we mourn the loss of many others, some far too young, since the last entry of the Golden Book.

As we hope for peace in the world, here and abroad, we look forward to our next anniversary with the continuing resilience of our family and our ties to each other.